How my stock photo relationship failed : The previously untold story of a uber hot model and the contrived pain and made-up loss he had to appear he was dealing with.

On a lighter note………..

mens-reviewThe previously untold story of a super-hot male model and the contrived pain and imaginary loss he had to deal with.

Its not easy being in a fake relationship contrived to give the millions of web sites licensed images for the stories they run. Being in a stock photo relationship has many issues and problems a so called normal relationship have no idea about. One of the toughest parts if your whole relationship is based on relating to each other in a false and unnatural way, whilst all the time trying your dandiest to look natural.


So yeah that look of love they are giving you when your staring into each other eyes in a field of dandelion , which sun drenched horizons appears and crisp blue sky, that’s like total bullshit and you know it as well. It doesn’t help a minute ago  you heard them barf up the pop tart they ate for breakfast

On the surface of it there is nothing to criticise , your are both hot and and who wouldn’t be happy posing arm in arm on island beach paradise.

Asian bride and groom stroll with flower bouquet through sand and waves on Lanikai beach, Kailua, Hawaii







Essential we have all the wonderful phoney moments that normal relationship could dream of,  as we cuddle up on the couch on Sunday morning, smiling ear to ear .








It seems we have got in made but then something starts to happen, they start asking you to act, even if it 2 dimensional, acting wasn’t  what you signed up for. Having a bland and lifeless face, expressing faint glimmer of emotions, was what modelling was all about and taking drugs of course and perpetuating a shallow and materialistic  view of the world, that to.









So when you’re asked to just laugh in hilarious way, OMG that’s not easy. I had trouble working out my fake constipation look and my laughing naturally look.  You start regretting being so high when you did the weekend method acting course 3 years ago. Maybe one  of the two notices that their fake laughter is better than your bogus laughter and starting thinking they could be brought down, despite  how incredibly handsome you are.








Resentment kicks in as you wonder who they hell is that fake person they are fake calling while you pretend to pretend to be asleep.










Maybe at first you try make things better by going on magical sham day out at the fair, as way of getting back that imagined spark, that only a forced stock photo can do.







If that doesn’t work,  you may have to see a made up counsellor and furrow your eyebrows more than you have ever done before and double down on the moment by folding you arms.Snap just nailed it.








Often kids are brought in to try light things up. Oh shucks, those little scallywags, This little muchin will be hot like me when he grows up, so how can you not love them. As their little adorable white Aryan face looks up to you and says “I pretend to love you fake daddy.”










Fake children as any fake parent knows , are not easy to handle. Before you know it the fictitious kitchen is a mess and pretend mum is just so caught up in their fabricated stress.









For you things seem to get even worse, as you hit the bottle of lemon ice tea and reinvent every “I’m a man and I’m drunk and depression” chiche you can muster.









Yet  you can see it in her eyes, she has lost her fake respect she never had for you, even  though your sporting a sexy  but rugged 3 day stubble.









So the time has come to say goodbye and pretending that you give a shit and reach your beautiful hand out for one the last time.







Then your contrived sad face come over pristine porcelain skin and you know it’s time to pretend to look in to the distance and make out you are  letting go, whilst remaining mysterious but sexy.








So yeah I feel the pretend pain, I feel the sense of manufactured loss, like any person, look at me can you see  on fine chiseled features the pretend tormented and moody/pensive state I am in?








So I console myself I am uber hot and willing to comprising whatever to advance as male model. So as the rain falls down and I pose just in the right away and wonder when I will  meet the artificial love of my life. Here is pretending to hope.

download (1)

2 thoughts on “How my stock photo relationship failed : The previously untold story of a uber hot model and the contrived pain and made-up loss he had to appear he was dealing with.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s